living a life that is true to you
who do you want to be and where do you want to go?
Along with several other words in today's lexicon, the word "values" has sprung up in more conversations and blog posts over the past few months. "What are my values?" and "What do I value in life?" seem to be the springboards onto which fraught conversations are run.
Value can be what you esteem to be worth relative merit or importance; what you consider to be essential or important. What you won't back down on.
But are you backing down? Are your values taking a back seat to the monotony of life or the frenzied clamor of life and its draining entities?
Are you living a life that is true to you?
"I've started asking myself: What type of person do I want to be? How do I express my interests and values? Am I living a life that's true to myself and not the life others expect of me? By spending more time dreaming about what I want for the future, I've started to form a better idea of who I want to be and where I want to go". -Sarah Moss
I am utterly enamored of this quotation by Sarah Moss because it causes one to step back from the hustle and bustle of daily life and really examine what is adding value to our lives and what is not. It causes one to think about the things that they are doing and wondering introspectively if these things are being done for someone else because it is what is expected or are they being done because we want them to be?
You are never too old to re-imagine the direction of your life and decide that things aren't going quite the way you expected. It is also okay to feel a certain way about things and not feel guilty about them.
For example, I value my time with my daughter as sacred. If something is going to impinge on that time with her, I say no to other requests of my time. My child is only young once; there will be a point whereas she gets older, Mom is no longer "cool" and friends will become her end-all, be-all. Children grow so fast; before you know it, they are out of the house and on their way to university. So, for me, my daughter and our quality time come first. I place a high value on that.
While not related per se, minimalism helps me in this capacity. If I had to spend my time constantly arranging, organizing, and taking care of all of our things, I would have less time to spend with my daughter. Instead of snuggling together and watching a Charlie Brown cartoon, or baking cookies together, I would be cleaning, organizing, and taking care of our stuff.
And that is just not okay with me.
My life is a simple one, because I have made it so. That is not to say that I don't experience heartache or have difficulties that I continue to overcome, it means that I choose a simple life because it aligns with my values. I strive for a minimalist lifestyle because spending time with loved ones is important to me and spending time taking care of stuff, is not. A simpler life helps keep me on my way to having more fullness in my life.
I still have dreams that I can't wait to bring to fruition. Approaching a new decade in my life has brought home to me so many things, and I still continue to learn and grow and remind myself to stay true to the essence of who I am.
Are you living a life that is true to you?
📝 This post originally appeared on a blog that I once upon a time wrote essays for. I have found my previous words to be a balm and I am comforted in knowing that I still hold true to my original thoughts here. xx
What a beautiful essay! Knowing our values is so important to live a life that feels meaningful and true to who we are. I've realized a lot of people are struggling to find meaning in life, and feel bored and dissatisfied as a result. We used to have our values handed to us, whether through religion or school, and I think society now has many wide open paths rather than a chosen few. This is largely a good thing, I think, but with this freedom comes the need to consciously identify what we stand for, and I'm not sure many people have identified this gap or necessity, and so find themselves floundering a bit. Thanks for sharing this insightful essay!
I've never thought about minimalism as a means of spending time on things you care about, but I've realised that's how I'm currently living my life. Thank you for articulating that beautifully!